Classic, and you've already known that.
You've already known not to expect anything when you're stepping a higher level of your life which always, and always, means that life gets harder. If you enjoy your high school too much, it must be just because you're too young to be mature and too old to be treated like kids. At that phase, you'll be you, only your self. No one will take too much control of you, and no one will force your work at the same time. That is exactly your comfort zone. Guess what happens when you're leaving, you're standing staring at these words like me, acting as an idiot facing the world.
I say this to remind, doesn't mean that I'm not happy enough to write happy things. You know, the word 'happy' its self tastes so much different when you're in high school with when you're in college. It is undescribable that I am happy right now to write this while much pressure is freaking me out right here. Exam, assignment, love, and life matters that are never-ending really make additional colors to my colorful days. Enjoy life, it always finds ways.
How can a college time be at its worst?
What is the most possible feeling when you have to face exam every week in fully a year? If you say you're happy, just be adults and don't be here. It is a big lie if I say the exam pleases me a lot. Actually I feel grateful to have them so that they make time flies really fast that I can finish my college life as fast as possible. No, I don't want to quickly be adult, but yes, I start getting sick facing exams.
What can be worse than exams? Assignment, the never-ending ones. When you have to face new assignment everyday and you just want to skip your first year, but then you realize you can't go anywhere because you'll face twice of them on the second year and four times on the third and they will just crack as amoebas when they are reproducing their selves. Overall, what you do is sitting and putting your hands on the table while staring at those assignments with little-kitty-stares wishing they will help you someday with your real job. No, I am not that old to think about working stuffs but yes, I think about the possibility of having my own money.
Value of life is not always about what is stated on your report paper. Marks don't make sense if you don't have enough link to implement them to real life. You have to make it worth the work. Yolo! It is a need to find real friends here, to mingle with as many people as possible, to do as many projects as we can, to do everything. You can't live fake life that you need friends to be with you till the end. No, it's not about being lack of friends but yes, it's about needing friends its self.
Worse and worse, when you think you can live alone without your parents abd you'll be free. It is a fact that you need them as much as you need air to breathe. It will be a very hard time when you start missing and all you can do is just touching their faces through laptop monitor while skyping instead of hugging them and give kisses. Your tears probably turn into rivers on your face and your breath will hold in every two seconds. You cry, or at least you feel like crying. No, I didn't cry for everything happening here but yes, I need to admit that it's always been a sad truth that I miss everything every once.
Classic thought, if you have ever thought love life in college is as easy as finding a tree in the middle of the jungle. Yes, there will be so many boys you meet, but the one who'll be your only one will be harder to find. It will be hard time when everything runs out of your planned line. Moreover, if you are loving in distance. Thoughts you can never tolerate, truth you can never deny, invicible burdens, will absolutely freak you out. When you miss the one you love but you can't even tell, when he misses you but you can't even know. When every single business you have crashes every single business he has. When reality seems a scary place to live that you can do nothing to change it. No, I'm not asking too much but yes, everybody deserves what they make deserved.
Finally, like finally, I just can hold my breath for a while then sigh, facing reality that it has been eleven at night, I'm having exam tomorrow with many assignments craving for energy to spend for, I'm hard missing my parents that I keep my self in patience while finding most of my friends spend their weekend with their family, I miss the one who is never tired to make me tired but never tired enough to always be with him along these hard days, and I wish I don't live here in a place called reality.
Good night, good people. Make your only-once-life worth the wait.
❤️
And remember, life always finds its way...
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