A NEW YOU

Entering the new stage of your life, my life too eventually, the time when you've passed one more adorable phase of your adorable life. Those moments when you fought for your self, to find the real side of you, when you finally found who your true friends are, when you then knew what love is, met an amazing beast to fall for, took your sword to keep your pride, to keep your family, when you knew that life is not always good, you found enemies, you liked stupid things, new things, bad, good, great things.
Yes, high school.

Memories we can't even forget, things we can't even deny, moments we can't even replay, times we can't even repeat make me always wonder how I will be on the next stage of life. I mean, it really is hard to move on, to simply move up, to make something really new while you are walking forward leaving your old things behind. You know, old things are still your things.

And it will be harder if you've already fallen for it.
Well, let's stop this menye.

We are facing the reality that we step on a higher stair, when we will be free (or maybe alone for those-who-cannot-be-far-away-to-their-parents, really) from parents, live our own life, earn money, work for your self, study, study, study, finish your study, create something new, impress lecturers, create other achievements, go abroad for fun, search for many kinds of scholarship, and finally make your parents never regret to have you in their life.
Yes, college.

That new (I am actually worrying of my own word 'new') atmosphere will lead you to new environment and finally the new you. Good things enter your life. You can learn how to dance salsa, or be a cook, or paint famous-to-be paintings, or whatever you newly know in this step. You can find diligent people who will make you love your books, mechanics to teach you how to make over your motorcycle, engineers to show you how to work scientifically, even scientists who can make you enter laboratory more often than what you can imagine.
But remember, bad things will never let good things fight alone. They feel pleased to accompany good things everywhere. You probably find bad people who will show you how to smoke, how to drink, how to enter the dance floor, how to use drugs, how to club, how to gamble, how to date bitches, or whatever you newly know in this step. They can simply lead you to be far, and more far away from your parents, and even God. Or maybe simple bad things, like railing or cursing by bad words, or by defaming people by things they don't belong. They probably call you bitch or pig or dog or others. They maybe force you to manipulate or bully a nerd. They maybe just take advantages of what you have.

And it is your choice how you will live.

I am not that brave enough to face this world alone too. I need God in a very huge proportion. I need my angels sent by Him, my parents. I need my best friends to catch me when I'm falling and to lift me when I'm high. I need my super beast to shed loves and to be shed by loves as a bonus. But I am preparing my self always for the worst. Simple thoughts, worrying about simple things. I just can keep encouraging my self not to be dumb, and what I really, really want you all to emphasize here is not to be dumber than me.
Just don't be dumber than me.

Keep positive, people. Think positive, do positive. Be a woman with girl's style and lady's thoughts. Be a man who deserves your lady. Just remember that good people always gather with good people, better with better, and best with best. The rest is just your choice whether to be good, better, or best. In this college stage you will be a new you undeniably. But this new you will be on the path you're building right now, in an atmosphere you're preparing right now, and in a mind you're planning right now. So don't procrastinate, build a new you from now on.
I wish I thought of it earlier. But life is never too late for something good.

Be in the business of being awesome!

From now on.
Just don't be dumber than me.

PASCA-EXAM-PHASE

So, how does it feel to be in a pasca-exam-phase?
Maybe some of you feel that it is really needed to relax by going somewhere or doing something you had never ever done in your life. Or maybe some other choose to be comfortably home preparing everything for the next exam. Me? Oh if only I can really choose.

Life is hard. But when you are facing your exam, it is harder.
And unfortunately, for my parents, everyday is my examination.

If I can barely choose, as a freedom-enjoy-er, I'd rather spend almost all my savings for the sake of vacation. Well I can go anywhere. To your house, probably. Or just by playing around to my relatives' houses in many beautiful places like Bali or Palembang or even Papua (I don't have any relative there btw, but everyone is family, right?). Or one dream I miserably haven't reached yet is visiting my bitch's dream house (I mean, it is!) in Lombok.

Before I continue, you have to clear your mind about what I do mean by bitch. Really.

If, only if, I have a chance to get my second option, it would be hanging out with my friends. No mall (it is not a recommended place for real playing) nor even movie. I'd rather choose to climb a mountain or follow a long, long river or do a risky rafting or play with adrenaline. I honestly don't like height, but I really want to feel how it is like to fall from a kilometer high (of course it is bungee jumping, not self-killing) or how it feels to go to another river side by rope or how it would be to walk on a very high rope-made bridge. I can vomit or even be stupidly fainted. But I DO want it.
I am just too afraid of being silly. That's how I need my oh-please friends with me.

But the main problem here is, my parents don't like adventure.
My parents hate adventure. My adventure, briefly.

Do you have any to-do list? I do.
And the first thing I really want to do later, in my college, is take gunning course. I always imagine my self looking straight to one red point and in a very slow motion I shot my shot to the shot spot. And see, how that red point is pointed then that pride flows from my head to the toes. It has to be so good.
Second, obsessed to polo sport (but it's likely impossible to have that sport in Indonesia), I want to ride horse. I've spend my childhood imagination to wait for that prince charming riding white horse while giving the sweetest smile in the entire world and pick me up and say 'let's fight together, my princess, for our happily-ever-after'. But realizing that no prince will come that way, so why don't I try to be that princess charming? No weirdness, R A Kartini taught us.
So you, my prince who doesn't ride white horse, just be prepared.
Third, can somebody please teach me fencing? Sword play always looks great! It is a combination of crime and art and I love both. I can have that sight in my head, where some criminals intend to kill me or ask my money (even if I just have a dollar, they don't deserve), then I stay calm and give a cool cynical smile, then I secretly touch my waist where I put my sword, then they come forward but I have already hold my shiny and sharp steel and stab them! And boom, they run stupidly afraid of me.

Once again, don't you see that those are all adventure?

Final conclusion is that right here right now I am writing this post in a very cold night, fail to edit my own blog because of being too busy staring at my schedule.
My schedule, that tomorrow, the day after tomorrow, the day after the day after tomorrow, and some months later, I have to swallow the reality to have an intensive course to enter university, to be obsessed to dietary management, to take driving course (please, I have had my driving license!), to gather with my business partners, and no vacation. No vacation, at all.

Accept the truth.
And I always do. Because being grateful is what all human beings really need to live a life.
Well, have a good time, everyone!

COUNTDOWN

19. Libur

18

17

16

15. Ujian Nasional

14

13

12

11

10

9

8

7

6

5

4

3

2. Hari ini

Orang bilang, ringan atau beratnya suatu masalah itu tergantung dari bagaimana kita melihat dan menyikapinya. So, instead of saying it's D-13, I'll say it's D-17 :D

Orang bilang, lama atau tidaknya waktu itu tergantung dari senang atau tidaknya kita selama menjalaninya. Tiga belas (tujuh belas ding) hari itu tidak lama kan? Berarti kita senang menjalaninya :D

Orang bilang, bersusah-susah dahulu, bersenang-senang kemudian. Mungkin maksudnya, berusahalah (dengan senang) dahulu, bersantai-santai (dengan senang juga) kemudian. Life's too short to be lived unhappily :D

Karena Tuhan pun bilang, bahwa sesungguhnya dibalik setiap kesulitan selalu ada kemudahan..

إِنَّ مَعَ الْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا 
 "Sesungguhnya bersama kesulitan itu ada kemudahan" (QS Al Insyirah 94:6) 

Dan kita bisa lihat, bahwa sesungguhnya dibalik Ujian Nasional ada libur panjang...